Monday, December 05, 2005

Waiting for God, Hoping for M.

Over the time that’s passed since my last post, I came to realize that a lot of my doubts and frustration have stemmed from my obvious impatience with God. A lot of them also stem from the complications that M has been facing with regard to being able to see his daughter. Four months have passed now -- and God only knows what an eternity that must be to a five year old child.

For those four months, M has been waiting, and despite the fact that he is 24, this time has been no less excruciating. My prayers, seemingly unanswered, have begun to decrease, though the urgency of the situation has increased all the more. I keep telling myself that I have to believe that with God all things are possible. Yet, a solution to this nightmare seems so far off. I pray anyway.

Tomorrow morning, the court in Fauquier County will hear M’s petition and I will come face to face with the “ex” that so far has been little more than a name to me (aside from being the faceless girl who stalks my nightmares). After more than a month of waiting in hope of a pro-bono lawyer taking M’s case, and with little more than 2 hours left to the work-day, my hope that M will secure counsel before our 9:00AM court appointment is waning. It’s not that I doubt that God can do it, it’s that I doubt whether or not He will.

Although I realize that a lot of what is happening in M’s life is the result of his actions in the past, I also realize that M is the very sort of person one might describe as being “unlucky.” He just cannot seem to catch a break.

I’m fearful of tomorrow, though I know it would be better to enter into it with more hope. How long will we wait before God changes his ex’s heart? (If He chooses to.) How long will we wait before God moves in this situation? (If He chooses to.) At this point, even one more day seems like too long. But sadly, even if we put this all on God, it’s not, because it involves other people. For all we know, God may already have moved, but that doesn’t take us past the element of his ex’s free will to decide – or, in this case, the judge’s. It makes it a little difficult to believe that this is all in God’s hands when it seems that there are so many players who will determine M’s – and his little daughter’s -- fate.

I have to believe that all things will work together for good for both of them. But, when? Hopefully soon, when it seems that only a miracle will fix this situation... I ask anyway.

23 comments:

martie said...

Miracles still happen Nan and even if your prayers aren't answered the way you want them to be, God does answer in his own way and time. It is very hard to remain patient while waiting for answers in a tragic situation such as this one but hang in there. I am praying for you, M and his daughter too!

Kc said...

These are such hard things to endure. I'm so sorry for the present situation but I have hope He will provide for everyone who loves Him.

Corry said...

God works in mysterious ways.
Keep up that patience and the hope and have faith God knows best, no matter how things work out.

Praying for y'all.

God's Grace.

Laura said...

Good luck Nan

Kristi said...

Hey, I'm praying for you as you go through this. I know God will work for your best and His glory! You've got to trust His timing is perfect. Hang in there. I hope seeing the ex won't be too terribly difficult.

Much prayers!!

Rick's Corner said...

May G-d grant you the strength to cope with life's difficulties, and the wisdom to make effective solutions.

Here is the English version of the threefold Shabbat blessing.

"May the Lord bless and protect you."

"May the Lord show you kindness and be gracious to you."

"May the Lord bestow favor upon you and grant you peace."

Nunzia said...

In spite of all our doubts, God came through and our prayers were answered!! M finally won -- and he'll be seeing his daughter again sooner than we could have imagined!! Never underestimate the power of prayer... I never should have! :) Thank you all for yours!

Corry said...

Thank You Lord!

God's Grace.

green said...

I'm late to the party but let me say congrats to M and yourself. Never doubt Gods plan and remember His timetable for things to happen is generally not our own. God knows what will happen and it will be in perfect accord with his plans for all parties involved.

Read the short OT book of Habbakkuk for a great example of human impatience vs. God's timetable.

Rick's Corner said...

Glad things worked out.

I'm not glad that I'm getting forgetful and beginning to have senior moments. I sent you the Shabbat prayer on this and one of your other posts. Well, maybe two times is better than one.

Bill Scott, Sr. said...

I am praying for you. I have had to deal with court battles for my 13 year old son. I understand the fear and frustration. If you want to hear my story I will tell you but its to lengthy to post here.

Bill

crossblade said...

I just hope and pray that all goes well
God be with you and M , dear Nancy
love n prayers
thomas

crossblade said...

I just hope and pray that all goes well
God be with you and M , dear Nancy
love n prayers
thomas

Corry said...

Nan, can I link to you? And would you do us the honour of joining the Prayer E-mail List?

God's Grace.

~Deb said...

Wow~ I think we're both thinking in sync here girl! God does work in mysterious ways- my problem is 'patience'. I can't. I don't have any. But--the thing is- trust and have faith.

Everything does work out for the better----and if God sees that it is not for the 'best'---then sometimes we have to wait. Ugh. Sometimes it's worth it though, right?

Pia said...

hi, nunzia. i read your posts and the comments and it touched my heart. you doubted. you prayed. and God pulled through for you. prayers are really powerful. thank you for sharing. it gave me hope.

God bless.

Damian said...

As you can see, you have alot of people praying for you and M that's power right there. All you have to do is believe in it. Take care and I also will pray for you both that God's will will be revealed to you both.

Corry said...

I am sorry about the mails. It has never been so busy as these last days. We completely understand and we took you off the mailing list but you are considered a partner anyway:-)
We pray all is well and keep you in our prayers.

God's Grace.

Nunzia said...

Thank you so much and that means a lot to me! God bless!

crossblade said...

I'm so happy to read about the happy things happening in M's life

God bless ya
thomas

martie said...

Praise and Glory to God for things working out with M and his daughter. I am so happy for all of you and will keep you all in my prayers!

Merry Christmas!

Kitty Cheng said...

Romans 8:28 is God's promise for us His children...I admire your trust in Him. God Bless you!

Karin said...

Sometimes He says yes, sometimes He says no, and sometimes He says not yet. I'm happy to hear your prayers have been answered. It's hard to remember that God knows better than us sometimes isn't it? And that we have to pray for HIS will versus ours. That is tough stuff. But I'm so happy for you and M. :)

Thanks for stopping by my place, by the way. :)