Friday, October 13, 2006

Loved By God

I am a sinner. I am so far from perfect. Never have been, and quite certain that I never will be. Yet, I am loved by God. Though sometimes I despise this body that I so often take for granted, I am told that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I have read that suffering and physical pain produce patience and perseverance but, so often, I’m too bound, too selfish, too caught up to be made wise. I’m such a stubborn girl. And though I’ve been such a reluctant student, I’ve received such divine instruction. I’ve gained so greatly from the lessons I too soon forget. Only to have the nerve to question why I’m at a loss again, as though there’s anyone to blame but me. I’m so forgetful. So ungrateful, it would seem, for all that I’ve been shown -- for the trouble God has pulled me through, for the reward I could have never earned.

It’s so hard to comprehend the love of a God that I have never seen and only known.

What could I have done to deserve the love of One who is more perfect than I’ll ever comprehend, when I’ve done nothing but disappoint and reject and forget, time and time again? And there’s the truth: The answers not a thing. The same conclusion, once again, comes down to that cold sentence: “It’s not about me.” It’s all about Him and His Grace: a Love, a Forgiveness that I could never deserve – not even if I had 100 lives to live.

And sometimes the burden seems too much to bear. How could I live up to that, knowing I’m so apt to fail? [I can't.]

“All men sin and fall short of the glory of God.” That’s little comfort to me now. Yet, whether we glorify Him or not, He’s still there watching, loving, providing. His hand is steady, though we’re so easily moved. He remains willing to widen the road beneath our feet if we should lose our way in a world where there are so many lost. He seeks to find them out.

How could I ever express the gratitude I feel for a Gift no works of mine could ever match?

I can only try to live a life that's worthy, knowing I’m so certain to fail, certain that in any case, through anything, He’ll love me still.

9 comments:

Godwyn Lim said...

Hey! I just wrote an entry similar to yours, about God's love!

Great post Nan! I felt the same in the many lines that you expressed!

Yet how awesome is our God, His love is our eternal blessing!

Have a great week ahead, embraced by His love...

myepinoy said...

I certainly agree with what you have written here.

Humans are humans but with God's grace and love human are transformed to something better.

MY GOD BLESS YOU. THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS.

Flex J! said...

Let this kind of love continue to inspire us to keep on keeping on.....walking with God!

Nice post sis....

Corry said...

Thanks for putting my re-occuring thoughts into words:-)

God's Grace.

green said...

That is a wonderful post and excellently written!

Amen for God's grace.

Tim Rice said...

If I correctly recall the narrative of Abraham in the Bible and some commentary in the New Testament (was it in Hebrews?), Abraham was counted as righteous because of his faith. It wasn't what Abraham did but who he trusted. Yes, Abraham fell a number of times; but he kept getting back up from his fall and returned to looking to God for his salvation and his future. I think that is what God wants of us.

Kc said...

Nan, we will continue to pray for your sister. Please update when you can.

audrey` said...

Hi Nan

How are Michelle and Baby Abby?
Praying for both of them...

Pia said...

hi, nan! happy birthday! luv you, girl! =)