I Go On... (freewritten)

Excuse me while I backslide
but you don't pardon me
from the images that haunt my dreams
and fill up my nights endlessly
the empty spaces in between the days
once occupied by you
Aside from stay awake, what can I do?

Told me I was too destroyed
still, I'm moving steps ahead
after every leap back,
after every misstep,
after everything you never said.
And I'll get there if I try
was never one to give up anyway
was I?

Forgive me for caring too much
for wanting more for you than I did me
sorry my foolish love was not enough
I gave you my heart carelessly
And though you hold it in your grasp
everyday your face, your voice, disappear for me
a little more
each day brings you closer towards
the past for me
I'm already yours.

Excuse me while I move on
you may think it's just pretend
someday you'll realize what you gave up
though I'm now lost, it's you that loses in the end.
And though the loss is all I feel
there's much more to believe in
Just give me some more time to work it out
I'll get past this point of grieving

My heart doesn't hear but my head knows
you're already too far gone
and I'm backsliding constantly... yet, somehow,
I go on.